Start With Feeling: The Power of Setting Emotional Goals

What if your goals didn’t start with what you want to do…
…but how you want to feel?

It’s the first day of the month, and before diving into strategy, scheduling, or productivity, I pause to ask myself:

How do I want to feel this month?

For me, the answers come quietly but clearly:
Cared for. At ease. Energized. Connected. Courageous.

These are my emotional anchors—my feeling goals.

A few years ago, I created a framework called 4D Goal Setting to help myself (and my clients) connect goals with more than just to-do lists.

We set intentions across four dimensions:

1. Doing (actions, habits, projects)

2. Feeling & Being (emotional states + inner qualities)

3. Having (results, income, experiences)

4. Impact (how we want to affect others or the world)

This month, I’m starting with Feeling & Being—specifically:

I want to feel cared for.

You might wonder, “But don’t we need others to feel cared for?”

Yes, and no.

There’s one person who will stay with me until my final breath:
Me.

So I ask:
What can I do to help myself feel cared for this month?

That’s where emotional goals turn into action goals:

✅ Prioritize consistent, quality sleep
✅ Gentle, regular movement (walks, yoga, stretch breaks)
✅ Intentional nutrition
✅ Nourishing social connections
✅ Protected space on my calendar for rest and joy

I’ve started blocking time in my calendar—not just for work, but for well-being.

Because while I love my work deeply, it’s easy to overgive and overlook the quieter needs of my body and spirit. (And yes, my toe still reminds me of the time I ignored that and was rushing, trying to do too much!)

Yes, sometimes I forget my own tools.
Even the ones I created.
Even I get hijacked by my survival brain.
That’s why I’m writing this—
To hold myself accountable. To walk my talk. (A bit of pain is still there, but it's getting better 😅)

And to invite you into this reflection too.

Today’s Mini M.E. (Mental & Emotional) Fitness Practice:

How do you want to feel this month?
And what would it take to give that feeling to yourself?

We talk a lot about goals in terms of productivity.
But what if we set goals for how we want to feel?

✨ This month, I’m starting there.
My word is: Cared For.

What’s yours?
And what’s one action you can take to generate that feeling for yourself?