When "just think positively" doesn't work

This week's idea: Stressed? Don't think positively.

"Everything is urgent and important and due yesterday. I should be able to prioritize better. What's wrong with me? I need to be more disciplined! And think more strategically! OMG I'm so overwhelmed…"

Ever been here? People depend on you, they need things now, and you're already behind on your own list.

I have. And so have most of the leaders I coach. They find themselves stuck in firefighting mode, fires everywhere they look.

It's almost impossible to prioritize from there. You can't think your best, can't plan long-term, can't communicate with clarity. So instead:

• You're short with a team member. Or your partner.

• You chew lunch while staring at your inbox, trying to clear a few more emails.

• You skip the workout, skip the break, thinking "no time."

• You don't delegate, because explaining it would take longer than just doing it yourself.

• And there's that low hum of anxiety that doesn't switch off, even at home, even at night.

Left running, this is the road to burnout, resentment, a rage-quit with no real plan, strained relationships, and, ironically, worse results, because you've become the bottleneck.

So what do you do? Think more positively?

Nope. Even if someone tells you to, or even if you tell yourself to at 3 am, one positive thought is not going to wash a wave of calm and clarity over you.

Here's why: overwhelm, anxiety, overthinking... that's not a mindset problem. It's a signal that your nervous system is overloaded, and your brain literally cannot reach its strategic, clear-thinking gears from there. More thinking just feeds the loop: worst-case scenarios, tighter chest, sharper tone.

You can't think your way out even when your brain tries to. More thinking will keep you stuck in the anxious loop. 

The 30-second practice: PIT Stop

This week we add one muscle to the self-awareness we practiced last week: self-regulation. (Two powerful parts of emotional intelligence.)

The whole practice is one rep. When you notice your mind spinning and you catch yourself feeling anxious, overwhelmed, irritated with the situation or yourself:

P = Pause

Stop typing, scrolling, explaining, or solving, just for a moment. 

I = Inhale

Place a hand on your stomach or heart.

Take one slow breath in and allow your belly to expand.

Exhale slowly.

T = Tune in

Notice one physical sensation. 

Feel your feet touching the floor. 

Notice the chair supporting you. 

Feel the temperature of the air on your skin. 

Listen for one sound around you. 

That's it! By doing this short PIT stop, you interrupt the autopilot of negativity and return your attention to the present moment. 

That is one mental fitness rep.

First, you notice the spiral. That strengthens self-awareness.

Then, you interrupt the spiral instead of automatically following it. That strengthens self-regulation.

Still feeling overwhelmed?

Take a slightly longer pit stop.

Walk to get a glass of water and feel the cup in your hands.

Take a restroom break without bringing your phone.

Step outside for a five-minute walk.

Notice your feet, your breath, the sky, or the temperature around you.

Your brain may protest:

I don’t have time for this.

This is not going to solve the problem.

I need to keep working.

But think about a NASCAR driver.

In the middle of a race, every second matters. And yet, drivers still stop.

Why?

Because refusing a necessary pit stop does not help them win. It can cost them the race, or something far more important.

Your pit stop is not a distraction from effective leadership.

It is what helps you return to the situation with greater clarity, choice, and control.

The more often you practice stopping, the sooner you can recognize when you are entering survival mode, and the more quickly you can return to thoughtful, strategic action.

You can start today.

One PIT STOP rep at a time.

One question

What's your favorite PIT stop rep? 

Feel free to share by replying to this email or sharing in the comments below if you read this on the website. 

With appreciation for you and your inner fitness work,

Lucie

Creator of (and a student in) MindFittery

One resource

Want to practice live, with others? Each week I lead a live Inner Fitness Circle session that opens with a "Pit Stop" that is a little different every time. 

It is an opportunity to pause, recharge, and strengthen your inner fitness in a safe, judgment-free space with others.

[Explore the Inner Fitness Circle]